"Good Manners" display respect, care, and consideration. Everyone has a basic right to help another and feel positive about themselves and others around them. In our age of self-satisfaction, technology and instant internet gratification, it is often hypothesized that we care more for our equipment than those for whom they are made.
It's common sense that people prefer a reasonable amount of respect. If you nurture plants, animals, or other humans, not only will they grow and bloom - but you will as well. Outside of material goods the basic things we all really own are ourselves and our actions. It's really good to have good manners. Without good manners, we cannot live a great life. So it's important.
"Good Manners" display respect, care, and consideration. Everyone has a basic right to help another and feel positive about themselves and others around them. In our age of self-satisfaction, technology and instant internet gratification, it is often hypothesized that we care more for our equipment than those for whom they are made.
It's common sense that people prefer a reasonable amount of respect. If you nurture plants, animals, or other humans, not only will they grow and bloom - but you will as well. Outside of material goods the basic things we all really own are ourselves and our actions. It's really good to have good manners. Without good manners, we cannot live a great life. So it's important.
Think about phone manners and observe appropriate phone etiquette at all times.
- If you need to use the phone, excuse yourself outside or to a quiet room/hallway.
- Don’t phone before 7:00 am and after 9:00 pm unless in an emergency or an important overseas call. Also avoid calling people during meals, work, and school. People don't expect you to drop in and visit at these times, unless it is arranged. This includes texting, though you would obviously not text for emergencies.
- Ensure the number you have is correct. If you do disturb someone and it’s the wrong number then ‘please’ have the decency to say, “I’m so sorry! I have the wrong number!” DO NOT just hang up. That individual may be ill, in a wheelchair, or elderly, etc., so you should show respect and apologize for their inconvenience. Likewise, if a person with a wrong number phoned you, politely point out that they have called the wrong number.
- Check your voice! It carries much more than just a tone, and reflects your character and personality even on the phone! Remember: your listener cannot see you, so your phone-voice becomes your facial expressions, gestures, personality, and character. Always check your voice when speaking; speak in a pleasant tone and very clearly. Smile through your voice! What they hear will make a positive or negative impression.
- When someone answers the phone don’t be harsh and abrupt by telling them what you want first. This confuses them and makes them wonder who you are. You also appear very rude, which is bad if you need a favor from them. It gives the wrong impression before you start! And don’t say, “Who is this?” You phoned them, so introduce yourself and state who you are and what you want – politely! For example; say “Hello, my name is Mrs. Peppermint, I'd like to speak to Mrs. Sally Lemon. Is she available?” If the person is not there, state to the person on the phone whether you will call back later or request they call you back. Or if you are making inquiries, state; “Hello, this is Mrs. Peppermint. I saw an advert in the local paper for a shop assistant; is that position still open?” When finished, say, “Thank you for your help. Goodbye” and be genuine! Now ensure you give them time to say ‘Goodbye’ too!
- Give people a chance to answer their phone! They could be outside in their garden, knitting, baking, washing the car, or at another end of the house. Don’t just ring three times and hang up! It's annoying when you stopped doing something and just as the phone gets to your ear the caller hangs up!
- Don’t spend an hour (or hours) chatting to someone. Don't waste people's time or disturb the household! It’s one of the biggest turn-off’s to having a friendly chat! They will not want to talk to you again.
- Answering your phone: Again – don’t forget to check your voice! Just be pleasant and polite and say, ‘Hello’. Avoid saying, 'Good afternoon, Smith residence' or 'John Smith speaking'. It's too dangerous today. If you are alone and you don’t know who the person is, don't tell them no-one is home or your husband is working, etc. Always pretend someone else is there. Use wisdom and good old-fashioned common sense! Be safe!
- If the call is for someone else, say something such as; “One moment please, I'll just go and call them for you.” Put the receiver down gently. If who they want to speak to is unavailable, say, “I’m sorry, Sally isn’t available right now. May I take a message for her and ask her to phone you as soon as she can?”
- If you must carry on two conversations at once you should always excuse yourself from one and resume it later. Say, "I'm sorry, can you hold on a minute; my boss is telling me something," and wait for the person's answer. If the personal conversation will last more than a minute, it would be better to ask, "Can I call you back? My mother needs to talk to me and it may take a few minutes."
- In case of needing a restroom break, say something to get off the phone, without sharing too much information. All you really need to say is 'Can you hold on for a few minutes? I will be right back.'
- When talking on the phone in a public space, keep in mind that everything you say is no longer just your news. Keep your voice at "indoor voice" level, or lower. Generally, people with good manners don't talk about potentially embarrassing private issues in public.
- When on the phone, don't talk with others in the room. What's worse than having a phone conversation with one who chats, perhaps not listening to what you're saying, and you can't tell if they are speaking to you or others. If someone tries to talk to you, simply point to your phone and they will get the message.
- Avoid using the computer while on the phone unless it's part of customer services. It is extremely rude and unpleasant when someone makes you listen to a clacking keyboard.
- Turn off your phone in films and don't text while pretending to pay attention to someone else. Never call during meals or important ceremonies, where mobiles should always be switched off at all times.
- Refrain from using your cell at check-out counters it is bad taste and horribly rude to talk on your cell while having an interaction with other individuals - particularly those people who are handling your money, be it in the grocery store, the mall or at a petrol station. It is unacceptable to treat cashiers as ATMs. Get off the phone, do your business, and then resume your call at a more appropriate time.
- When with others in a social setting, try to refrain from using your cell phone. It implies you'd rather be somewhere else, with someone else, and that who you are with is less important.
- If you need to use the phone, excuse yourself outside or to a quiet room/hallway.
- Don’t phone before 7:00 am and after 9:00 pm unless in an emergency or an important overseas call. Also avoid calling people during meals, work, and school. People don't expect you to drop in and visit at these times, unless it is arranged. This includes texting, though you would obviously not text for emergencies.
- Ensure the number you have is correct. If you do disturb someone and it’s the wrong number then ‘please’ have the decency to say, “I’m so sorry! I have the wrong number!” DO NOT just hang up. That individual may be ill, in a wheelchair, or elderly, etc., so you should show respect and apologize for their inconvenience. Likewise, if a person with a wrong number phoned you, politely point out that they have called the wrong number.
- Check your voice! It carries much more than just a tone, and reflects your character and personality even on the phone! Remember: your listener cannot see you, so your phone-voice becomes your facial expressions, gestures, personality, and character. Always check your voice when speaking; speak in a pleasant tone and very clearly. Smile through your voice! What they hear will make a positive or negative impression.
- When someone answers the phone don’t be harsh and abrupt by telling them what you want first. This confuses them and makes them wonder who you are. You also appear very rude, which is bad if you need a favor from them. It gives the wrong impression before you start! And don’t say, “Who is this?” You phoned them, so introduce yourself and state who you are and what you want – politely! For example; say “Hello, my name is Mrs. Peppermint, I'd like to speak to Mrs. Sally Lemon. Is she available?” If the person is not there, state to the person on the phone whether you will call back later or request they call you back. Or if you are making inquiries, state; “Hello, this is Mrs. Peppermint. I saw an advert in the local paper for a shop assistant; is that position still open?” When finished, say, “Thank you for your help. Goodbye” and be genuine! Now ensure you give them time to say ‘Goodbye’ too!
- Give people a chance to answer their phone! They could be outside in their garden, knitting, baking, washing the car, or at another end of the house. Don’t just ring three times and hang up! It's annoying when you stopped doing something and just as the phone gets to your ear the caller hangs up!
- Don’t spend an hour (or hours) chatting to someone. Don't waste people's time or disturb the household! It’s one of the biggest turn-off’s to having a friendly chat! They will not want to talk to you again.
- Answering your phone: Again – don’t forget to check your voice! Just be pleasant and polite and say, ‘Hello’. Avoid saying, 'Good afternoon, Smith residence' or 'John Smith speaking'. It's too dangerous today. If you are alone and you don’t know who the person is, don't tell them no-one is home or your husband is working, etc. Always pretend someone else is there. Use wisdom and good old-fashioned common sense! Be safe!
- If the call is for someone else, say something such as; “One moment please, I'll just go and call them for you.” Put the receiver down gently. If who they want to speak to is unavailable, say, “I’m sorry, Sally isn’t available right now. May I take a message for her and ask her to phone you as soon as she can?”
- If you must carry on two conversations at once you should always excuse yourself from one and resume it later. Say, "I'm sorry, can you hold on a minute; my boss is telling me something," and wait for the person's answer. If the personal conversation will last more than a minute, it would be better to ask, "Can I call you back? My mother needs to talk to me and it may take a few minutes."
- In case of needing a restroom break, say something to get off the phone, without sharing too much information. All you really need to say is 'Can you hold on for a few minutes? I will be right back.'
- When talking on the phone in a public space, keep in mind that everything you say is no longer just your news. Keep your voice at "indoor voice" level, or lower. Generally, people with good manners don't talk about potentially embarrassing private issues in public.
- When on the phone, don't talk with others in the room. What's worse than having a phone conversation with one who chats, perhaps not listening to what you're saying, and you can't tell if they are speaking to you or others. If someone tries to talk to you, simply point to your phone and they will get the message.
- Avoid using the computer while on the phone unless it's part of customer services. It is extremely rude and unpleasant when someone makes you listen to a clacking keyboard.
- Turn off your phone in films and don't text while pretending to pay attention to someone else. Never call during meals or important ceremonies, where mobiles should always be switched off at all times.
- Refrain from using your cell at check-out counters it is bad taste and horribly rude to talk on your cell while having an interaction with other individuals - particularly those people who are handling your money, be it in the grocery store, the mall or at a petrol station. It is unacceptable to treat cashiers as ATMs. Get off the phone, do your business, and then resume your call at a more appropriate time.
- When with others in a social setting, try to refrain from using your cell phone. It implies you'd rather be somewhere else, with someone else, and that who you are with is less important.
CA AMRESH VASHISHT, FCA, LLB,DISA(ICAI)
